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Jared Kleinman
Spigot Appearance Jared Kleinman stands at 5 feet and 7 inches tall with ginger hair. He wears large tortoiseshell rim glasses and favors clothing that has mostly "Meme" His most famous outfit, seen in "Sincerely, Me" is a gray Map of Westeros (Game of Thrones) t-shirt along with a red and white checked button-up shirt, jeans, and black Vans skate shoes. In the final scene of the show, he wears a faded red sriracha t-shirt with a short-sleeved blue and pink button-down shirt, khaki pants, and gray Vans, a classic Jared look. Other select clothing items include a gray and blue H&M hoodie, a pair of Brooklyn Calling cutoff shorts, blue Adidas tennis shoes, and a variety of Jonny Pops t-shirts worn underneath open-front shirts. He will never have gay sex. Jared's Personality Jared is very sarcastic, crass, and has a very know-it-all attitude. He is deeply insecure and uses humor to cover up just how much he, too, wants to ‘be found.’ He can be mean at times, using biting wit as a cover for the way he actually feels. Will Roland, who played him in the original cast, states that Jared embraces his friendship with Evan "as much as he knows how to, still sort of woefully inadequate”, implying that Jared may have suffered other bad relationships in the past. He doesn't want to get to close to Evan becuase he doesn't want to lose his "only friend" Despite this, he acts as a very blunt, mockingly amused voice of reason in contrast to Evan’s default panic mode, often adding inappropriate humor to a bad situation. Although it is never confirmed, it is speculated by some that Jared is gay due to him making quite a few jokes about homosexuality and acting oddly around the subject. Evan Hansen Jared expresses that he is not Evan's friend, and is instead a "family friend," and only talks to him because his parents won't pay for his car insurance if he doesn't. However, as the play progresses and Evan asks him to help with the fake emails, Jared starts showing that he cares more than he says, and he is a true friend of Evan. He and Evan bond over making this fake identity for Connor, and it becomes clear that Jared doesn't have many friends of his own. Evan and Jared create a cult against necrophilia and fans that sexualize actors Zoe Murphy He is seen in The Murphy's house during Disappear when Evan is proposing the Connor project and suggests that Zoe's jazz band play a song. He says, "Great idea, Evan," sarcasm laced through his voice, and when Evan thanks him, he responds, "No sweat." Additionally, during Act 2, he invites Evan over to steal alcohol from his parents. Evan declines, saying he has to "help the Murphy's," and when Zoe then comes onstage, she greets him before giving Evan a peck on the cheek. He says, "Look at you, helping the Murphy's," before stalking away. Quotes * "KINKY!" - "Sincerely, Me" * "Zoinks!" - Act 2 * "Will roland stans kinda scare me.." - Good For You * "Oh yeah, one of those SECRET EMAIL ACCOUNTS! For sending pictures of your penises to each other!" - Act I * "There is nothing UNREALISTIC about the love one man feels for another!" - "Sincerely, Me" * "Anthony Rosenthal is a furry" - You Will Be Found * "Is it weird to be the first person in history to break their arm from jerking off too much, or do you consider that an honor?" - Act I * "Holy shit. Holy fucking shit." - Act I * "I will never have gay sex." - Act 2 * "His parents think you were lovers, you realize that, right?" - Act I * "So you say what you need to say, and you play who you need to play, AND IF SOMEBODY'S IN YOUR WAY, CRUSH THEM AND LEAVE THEM BEHIND!" - "Good For You" * "NO." - In "Sincerely, Me" * "What are you, like, an acorn?!" Act I * "Connor, lovin' the new hair length, very school shooter chic." - Act I * “Weird sex letter” Talking about what the letter is after he finds out about Connor stealing it. * "Oh, I think it's hilarious. I think everyone would probably think it's just hilarious."- Act II * "YOU WHAT?! I can't believe you tried to kiss Zoe Murphy! On her brother's bed! After he died!"- Act I * "FUCK YOU, EVAN! ASSHOLE!" - Act II * "Okay, please stop hyperventilating," Act I Trivia * After a joke on Tumblr blog dearevanhansenheadcanons in late 2016, a joke originated, a derivative of the "Lov the Crunch" meme. The headcanon being that Jared works at a Lush store and eats the bath bombs. It got a little out of hand in the fandom for a while, as the fandom began to see Jared as an "uwu gay meme baby", but it has died down now (2018). * the tumblr blog has been taken down by angry will roland stans * Jared Kleinman appears in 7 musical numbers, his most popular being "Sincerely, Me." * Jared is canonically Jewish, as evidenced by his hebrew name as well as a line in the script that references his family celebrating Rosh Hashanah, a Jewish holiday. * His initials are JK. * In German, the word "klein" means "small," which may allude to Jared's shorter than average stature. * He sucks pp everyday ;) * Furry * woe such uwu owo bab ���������������������� Fandom Opinion Gay people discuss me. Opinions on Jared's character are often divided by controversy surrounding his behavior in the play. To some fans, Jared is viewed as either annoying or as the comic relief/meme character with no discernible depth. Jared's overall rating is high, therefore, Jared could be summarized as the sarcastic, lovable chill character. However, there are many critics of Jared as well, stating that he is "a mean jerk" sic and does not deserve redemption. Popular fan interpretations on Tumblr mainly portray Jared as gay or at the very least attracted to masculine-aligned people due to the context of several jokes he makes throughout the show. Because he masks his true feelings through a veneer of humor and snarky commentary, many believe that this is compelling evidence pointed toward him being insecure or otherwise unsure about his sexual orientation. Jared is not confirmed to be gay in the context of the play's canon, however, there are many convincing fan arguments that suggest that he potentially could be. Nommle says he is but nommles a dumbass. Category:Characters Category:Male